The True Key to Happiness: Be Selfish

Lately I have been justifying myself with the ever-so-popular, "I would (insert fun activity: meet up with an old friend, go to a new yoga class, go out in general, etc.) but I have just been extremely busy and can't find the time" excuse. We are all subject to this justification for not having enough time because we are fixated with the notion that being extremely busy--to the point where we don't even have the time to do the things that really make us happy--will be the true key to happiness. The reality is we need to make enough time for ourselves.

Point and case: my last semester at Auburn (war eagle!) I was taking 18 hours of classes (the maximum allotted amount of hours), worked about 20 hours, was in a sorority, woke up early almost every morning to work out, all while attempting to maintain a somewhat normal active social life. I became frustrated with the fact that I was doing it all, but never fully satisfied. Then my ah-ha! moment came to me: although I was doing everything I wanted to, I wasn't finding true happiness because I was not doing these things for me. Now, I am fully aware that my ah-ha! moment isn't anything profound and that you've probably heard it a million times over, but I ultimately realized that things were not going my way due to a lack of selfishness (a theory your second grade teacher probably never taught).

Believe-it-or-not, even after such a hectic semester, I've been having a difficult time winding down over the break. I still feel the need to constantly be busy i.e. working at Cusp, running errands, working out everyday, reading, writing--all things that do indeed make me happy, but I am doing them without myself in mind. This post is a true testament of doing something for me. I have been writing when I feel like I actually want to and there isn't the pressure of a deadline looming over my head. This blog in general has been something I have always wanted to do but, say it with me, "I never had the time." So over the break, I started this blog, for me; a written reminder that it is O.K. to be (mindfully) selfish.

Put the pen down &back away from the planner

Today I had the day off of work and so last night I started writing my to-do list in my planner. When I was literally "nose-deep" in my planner (see picture) I put down the pen and forced myself to be selfish. I decided rather than my normal early wake-up time I was going to sleep in until noon and go to Mariann's 1:00 2Hot yoga class. Maybe that sounds ridiculous to you, but I have trouble sleeping in because I feel as though I have lost valuable time, when in reality all I am losing is valuable sleep. My life does not have to revolve around a set schedule, and being spontaneous can liven things up a bit!

After yoga, I came home and made a delicious lunch and indulged in lots of reality t.v. (woo) I even took a long nap (I know, so spontaneous, right?) And when I was burdened with thoughts of you need to "drop off the dry cleaning" or "you really ate a lot, you should go for a run" I just let them go. I actually listened to my body and when I felt tired, instead of chugging coffee, or forcing myself to run, I took a nap. I also tend overstress about forgetting to call people and constantly worry about what other people think. Of course you need to have compassion for others but you must not let other people define your life. Maybe your stress vices aren't overexercising, overcaffeinating, or overcompensating for past mistakes but sometimes we all push our bodies further than they should go, both physically and mentally; we need to just let it all go and focus on the present.

So this break I have been determined to follow this piece of advice instilled by many of my yoga instructors, "let go." Seemingly so simple, yet one of, if not, the hardest things for us to do. At the end of practice Mariann said, "If your mind is still wandering focus on your breath and just let go to all of your thoughts. Inhale let and exhale go."